Advice from Dear Webby
Grandchildren are Exhausting

Dear Webby,

It's that time of year again. My husband's grandchildren come and spend the month before school with us every summer. We have a large home, yard, pool and a dog. It's great for my husband (he loves spending time with his grandchildren). The children love it and his son and daughter get a month off. Everyone loves it but me. I hate it. I cook, clean, do extra laundry and drop into bed each night exhausted. What can I do without offending anyone?

Signed: Exhausted

Dear Exhausted,

It is too late to do anything about this year's trip other than breaking a leg and being out of commission. I'm sure everyone has planned the visit by now.

I suggest you talk to your spouse and tell him how much you look forward to seeing the children (you do, right?) but that it is too much work for you to do alone and that you don't want them to think you're a grouch or party pooper when you go up to bed early.

I do not know the ages of the children but they might be able to help. Are you treating them like guests and not family? Could you take a day a week off to see your friends and leave him in charge, (to spend precious alone time with his little darlings)?

How about going out to eat a couple nights a week - kids love pizza and hamburger spots. Maybe you could get a sitter one evening and go out with your husband.

Use your imagination, it can be a fun time for all of you and someday they will grow up with happy lovely memories of their time with you. Make sure your memories are fun ones.

If this still is a terrible month for you, start making plans for next year and see if the visit could be 2 weeks instead of a month. However, remember that they will be a year older and perhaps more company for you and less work.

Good luck,